Home » Tips and Tricks » This Voice Recognition Software program Tried to Transcribe Docs’ Notes—and the End result Is Hilarious

This Voice Recognition Software program Tried to Transcribe Docs’ Notes—and the End result Is Hilarious

Wednesday, September 13th 2017. | Tips and Tricks

My work as a medical transcriptionist (MT) brings 
me in intimate contact with voice recognition (VR) software program. We MTs take heed to a physician’s dictation whereas reviewing the VR’s first cross on the typewritten medical document and edit as we go.

Now, I do know voice recognition is technically only a collection 
of digital ones and zeros in a specific order, however I’ve come to consider that the software program has the soul of an fool savant—a ghost within the machine, if you’ll. VR software program can decipher the thickest of accents speaking at lightning velocity utilizing dense medical terminology and get it proper. However VR software program can also be comically silly, as these actual examples exhibit. (These humorous phrases can truly enhance your vocabulary.)

october-2017-VV_DOW_US171044Nishant Choksi for Reader’s Digest

Take names. Does McRoberts actually sound like Crab Birds? Is it the savant or the fool who listens to peculiar names 
and hears Mr. Breakfast, Ms. Pulseless, Dr. Imply Itch, Ms. The Kittens, Dr. Ominous, and Mr. Loop Brains?

In a single single bodily, a Mr. Morton was recognized variously as Mr. Morton (good job, VR!), Mr. Martin, Mr. Marvin, Mr. Extra, Mr. Morgan, Mr. Mortise, and Mr. Morabito. 
Actually? No drawback spelling 
mediastinal lymphadenopathy in that report, although.

As to the character of the VR, it’s most 
like a teenage male, obsessive about scatological 
humor. As if it have been scrawling on a toilet stall, the machine turns three.5 mm Resolute stent into three.5 mm fairly lewd stent. I can simply hear it guffawing because it turns Oh, I’m sorry into orange diarrhea. I can see it wrinkling its 
digital nostril in disgust, turning 
gynecologic (“Ewww, girlie stuff!”) into title thought clot sick. (We all know you understand that’s not an actual phrase, however these humorous phrases that sound pretend are literally within the dictionary.)

Meals is a favourite matter. Minnesota is, in fact, then a soda, whereas sarcopenia, which is age-associated muscle loss, turns into sauerkraut anemia. 
(I can’t think about how the machine discovered about sauerkraut.) The poor soul with Takotsubo syndrome, a briefly weakened coronary heart muscle, is assumed to as an alternative have taco bowl syndrome—clearly, that affected person should even be an adolescent. However when somebody who is actually hemiparetic (weakened on one aspect) is as an alternative thought by the machine to be a 
chili pepper radical, we marvel simply how educated this machine actually is. It should have had a tough time in 
school—the College of Missouri is disdainfully referred to by the VR because the College of Distress.

october-2017-VV_DOW_US171044Tatiana Ayazo /Rd.com

As with many youngsters, women are continually on the VR’s thoughts. Physician: “We’ll proceed to watch her, however …” VR (leeringly): “We’ll proceed to watch her buttocks …”

When a physician dictates, “We’re going to attempt to get her coronary heart pumping higher,” the machine gleefully broadcasts, “We’re going to attempt to get her coronary heart clubbing higher.” This is sensible, as a result of although the physician opines, “She seems acute,” the machine proclaims, “She seems cute.”

The VR does present occasional 
glimmers of intelligence—even rowdy teenagers study some knowledge typically. One contrite VR, when itemizing consultations made on a affected person, heard, “Quantity one, Interventional Radiology,” however selected so as to add, utterly unsolicited, a quantity two—“Mom.” Sure, one ought to all the time seek the advice of one’s mom, don’t you assume?

And so, “this ends dictation,” or because the VR interprets that, “descending stairs.”

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